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Finding the courage to be your authentic self today
Ben Putano
May 15, 2024
Hello beautiful people!
As Pride Month approaches, I want to discuss a topic that is relevant to all of us: courage.
This Pride celebration is shaping up to be a sober one compared to years past. Last year’s backlash against corporate support of Pride has scared some of our largest allies from fully participating (more on that in the “What’s Worth Fighting For” section). We are likely to see more backlash and bigotry as anti-LGBTQ groups feel emboldened.
Now is not a time to cower. It is time to be courageous and proud.
Courage starts from within. I hope today’s newsletter inspires you to take that first step of your authentic journey.
✅ One Big Thing: Find the courage to follow your authentic path
“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” – Oscar Wilde
I love this quote for so many reasons.
First, I love Oscar Wilde’s intelligence, artistry, and talent. His stories have brought me endless hours of joy and transported me to some amazing places. Our community owes a lot to Mr. Wilde’s tenacity and the trials, the bigotry and harassment he faced for living authentically and simply loving another man.
This quote also speaks to the eternal optimist in me. Writing my book has made me realize there is still so much I want to do with my life and time.
It also keeps me grounded and humble. I never want to start a day without practicing gratitude. I really am trying to stop and smell the roses as my Mom always advised.
It has taken me over 50 years to feel what I feel today… happy.
I always say that I keep moving forward and that I do not live with regrets, but I am lying to myself. I have so many regrets and things I wish I could do over. Most of them are because I did not have the strength or the courage to embrace myself completely at a younger age.
Now I see that the key to life is to discover early what your authentic path looks like and to have the courage to go on that journey. Your job is not to know the exactly where the path will lead, but just to start walking.
At one point in my life, as an out gay man, I realized I had a choice to be invisible or invincible. It was not an easy path, but I used my strength to push forward, and I hope others can do the same. Just by living your authentic life openly and proudly, you are an activist and educator.
I hope you find your authentic path faster than I did, and that you enjoy the trip. Happiness is possible and finding your community and authentic path is magical.
🌟 Courageous Leader Spotlight: David Dancer, Clout for Good
David is an accomplished CEO, six-time CMO and host of the Clout for Good podcast, a show created to share the powerful and personal stories behind today’s most inspiring LGBTQ+ executive leaders and explore what it means to be “out” in corporate America.
He is also currently the Founder and CEO of D2 Marketing Strategies, providing business and marketing consulting services to companies seeking to differentiate their brand and drive sustainable growth.
Since coming out early in his career, David has been committed to the fight for LGBTQ+ workplace equality. David created Clout for Good to inspire LGBTQ+ people, their employers, and allies to build equity and inclusion in the workplace.
David served on the Board of Directors of the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN) for 10 years and has been involved with numerous LGBTQ+ sports teams. He is an avid tennis player, skier, and global traveler. David currently resides in New York, NY, with his partner, John.
Subscribe to the Clout for Good podcast (and here is my episode with David!)
🌈 What I'm LOVING ❤️❤️❤️
💒 20 Years of Marriage Equality. This week marks 20 Years since Massachusetts became the first state to legalize same-sex marriage. It was highly controversial at the time, but now two decades of research have made it clear: Extending the benefits of marriage to same-sex couples has been “unambiguously positive” for couples, their children, and our society as a whole.
RAND Corporation conducted a review of studies that confirmed the benefits of marriage equality. Read the full study.
Thank you to Brad Clark for sharing this study on LinkedIn!
🍆 Boardroom Inclusion. e.l.f. Beauty Calls for Diversity in Boardrooms With 'So Many Dicks' Campaign.
A new advertising campaign from e.l.f. Beauty highlights the fact that there are more men named Dick (Richard, Rich, Rick) on publically-traded boards than there are entire groups of under-represented people.
e.l.f.’s goal is to promote gender and racial diversity on boards across all publically-traded companies. Learn more about their campaign.
🌈 📘 New Book on LGBTQ Leadership. I am eager to read a new book by Layla McCay called Breaking the Rainbow Ceiling: How LGBTQ+ People Can Thrive and Succeed at Work.
Layla McCay is Director of Policy at the NHS Confederation and Executive Lead of the national Health and Care LGBTQ+ Leaders Network. She is also a psychiatrist and founder of the Centre for Urban Design and Mental Health.
The book explores the hidden differences that cause LGBTQ+ people to be underrepresented at the most senior levels of professional life.
Also: Read this wonderful interview Layla did with Fabrice Houdart.
✊ What's Worth Fighting For
🌈 The battle for inclusive workplaces. Best Buy’s Commitment to LGBTQ+ Causes Questioned by NY State Comptroller.
Best Buy is under attack by a conservative think tank for making contributions to The Trevor Project, GLAAD, GLSEN, and Sage.
These life-saving organizations help LGBTQ+ people of all ages—but especially children—find peace, health, and happiness as their true selves.
I have been a fierce supporter of many of these organizations, including sitting on the board for GLSEN.
We cannot let organizations be bullied for standing up for their beliefs.
Related: Target says Pride collection will appear in 'select' stores, cuts LGBTQ apparel for kids
After public scrutiny last year for their Pride merchandise, Target is cutting back its visible support of the LGBTQ+ community during Pride Month.
This is exactly what anti-LGBTQ groups wanted. I am sad that Target is stepping away from the fight when we need them more than ever.
🏳️🌈 Read All Pride, No Ego. A USA Today Best Seller!
Love the book?? It would mean so much if you would leave a review.
Last thing...
My friends at Allstora, Eric and Adam (and of course, RuPaul), have a brand new membership program for avid readers!
For just $5 a month, you can get 30% off their entire collection of queer books AND better support authors (Allstora is giving 100% of profits to authors from member book sales).
This is not a sponsorship, just an enthusiastic endorsement!
Learn more about the membership and show queer authors the love and support they deserve.
Until next time...
Jim